button to main menu  Lazy Tour of the Two Idle Apprentices

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Page 51:-
was the coast of Scotland opposite to Allonby, said Mr. Goodchild with enthusiasm; there was a fine Scottish mountain on the Scottish coast; there were Scottish lights to be seen shining across the glorious Channel, and at Allonby itself there was every idle luxury (no doubt), that a watering-place could offer to the heart of idle man. Moreover, said Mr. Goodchild, with his finger on the map, this exquisite retreat was approached by a coach-road, from a railway-station called Aspatria - the name, in a manner, suggestive of the departed glories of Greece, associated with one of the most engaging and most famous of Greek women. On this point, Mr. Goodchild continued at intervals to breathe a vein of classic fancy and eloquence exceedingly irksome to Mr. Idle, until it appeared that the honest English pronunciation of that Cumberland country shortened Aspatria into "Spatter." After this supplementary discovery, Mr. Goodchild said no more about it.
  Allonby via Aspatria
By way of Spatter, the crippled Idle was carried, hoisted, pushed, poked, and packed, into and out of carriages, into and out of beds, into and out of tavern resting-places, until he was brought at length within sniff of the sea. And now, behold the apprentices gallantly riding into Allonby on a one-horse fly, bent upon staying in that peaceful marine valley until the turbulent Doncaster time shall come round upon the wheel, in its turn among what are in sporting registers called the "Fixtures" for the month.
"Do you see Allonby!" asked Thomas Idle.
"I don't see it yet," said Francis looking out of the window.
"It must be there," said Thomas Idle.
"I don't see it, returned Francis.
"It must be there," repeated Thomas Idle, fretfully.
"Lord bless me!" exclaimed Francis, drawing in his head, "I suppose this is it!"
"A watering-place," retorted Thomas Idle, with the pardonable sharpness of an invalid, "can't be five gentlemen in straw-hats, on a form on one side of a door, and four ladies in hats and falls, on a form on the other side of a door, and three geese in a dirty little brook before them, and a boy's legs hanging over a bridge (with the boy's body I suppose on the other side of the parapet), and a donkey running away. What are you talking about?"
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button -- "Allonby" -- Allonby
button -- "Aspatria" -- Aspatria
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